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Monday 18 December 2017

The guy I've been seeing has vanished!

QAfter four months of dating, the guy I was seeing has vanished. Like into thin air. He's not returning my texts, and doesn't answer calls or emails.

I'm disgusted, and not only because he's a cold tosser, but because my best shoes and a good coat are in his place.

I want to go around and have it out with him but my friends have issued me with a restraining order. I don't want to be that loser girl who stalks a man but what am I supposed to do, just sit here and take his cruel treatment?

AIt's incredibly strange that this man has just disappeared out of your life for no apparent reason. Have you tried to contact his friends or family to see if he's actually okay? It would be awful to jump to conclusions if something bad had happened to him. However, if it turns out that completely ignoring you and hoping you'll go away is his method of dumping you, then that's a different story! It's a reflection of the kind of person he is, and should make it crystal clear to you that this is not the type of person that you should be with.

While it does seem unfair that he still has your shoes and coat, I advise you to stay away from his house. Don't let him think that you're wasting any time on him, he's not worth it. I would email him to demand your belongings back and see if there's any response, but avoid any further communication with him. He sounds like the kind of man that is best avoided at all costs.

QI am dating a gorgeous foreign girl, and so far all is going well, except for in the kitchen. She loves to cook, and I'm a man who loves to eat.

But she cooks dishes which are full of spices, and give me terrible indigestion and flatulence. I spend a lot of my time in her company trying not to embarrass myself.

Surely this could be sorted out if only she could be persuaded to do a stew or a pot of spaghetti Bolognese? So far my requests have fallen on deaf ears.

AYou're certainly lucky that your girlfriend feeds you so well and is enthusiastic about cooking for you. It's not the worst complaint to have, but your digestive system seems to be struggling with the flavours she loves to use.

Since any hints you have dropped seem to have gone unnoticed, my advice is to be perfectly honest with her. It's the best policy, and pretty unlikely that you'll hurt her feelings.

Simply explain that you adore her cooking for you, but you're not as used to the strong flavours and you'd really like some simpler dishes. I'm sure she'll be happy to accommodate you.

You'll be doing your relationship and your overworked digestive system a favour by just speaking out and being truthful.

QOur 17 year-old daughter is going to Ibiza with her friends following her Leaving Cert. My wife is very excited on our daughter's behalf, and is talking about getting her new clothes etc. But every time she mentions the trip my heart sinks, as there are as many guys as girls in our daughter's gang.

I don't trust these fellas and when I should be worrying about our daughter's exam results, I'm worried about beach parties and the like.

AThe post-Leaving Cert holiday is seen as a rite of passage by many, but as it has a reputation for being wild and drunken, I can completely understand why you're worried about your daughter.

For now, you must continue to encourage her to work as hard as possible for her exams. She will need all your support and guidance when it comes to those very stressful few weeks.

While I don't recommend that you try to stop her from going, or even make her fearful of what could potentially happen on the holiday, I do advise that you speak to her about what she can do to ensure she's safe.

On my own Leaving Cert holiday, me and my friends really looked out for each other. Nobody was allowed to go anywhere in groups of less than three, and we made sure nobody drank too much.

I would urge you ensure that your daughter and her friends follow these simple rules and are aware of their responsibilities to themselves and others before they go. I also suggest that you buy her a panic alarm to keep on her person at all times.

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