herald

Thursday 14 December 2017

my kids are my hopes and dreams

Nikki Redmond (39) from Dalkey

Nikki is a full-time mum to Daniel (6) and Amelie (4)

It was always my dream to have kids but, ironically, neither of them was planned! Because I am adopted, it was important to me personally to have children and be there for them. Of course, you have never done enough by the time you have kids -- I wish I had travelled more, and maybe tried a different career, but the time would never be completely right if you waited until things were perfect. I had my first at 31 and second at 34, which isn't considered young in medical terms.

My priorities have completely changed -- my children are my hopes and dreams now. The love is unconditional. Sometimes I do want to scream when they are being really bold but then 10 minutes later they tell me they love me and my heart melts. I appreciate some people's honesty in saying they don't want kids, it's not for everyone! With the advances in medicine it is possible to put it off, but I would remind people that it is hard from an energy point of view the older you are.

I would love to get back to work, but at the moment, it's not financially viable for us; with Amelie finishing school at 12.30, the childcare costs would be too high. I do miss my social life occasionally, especially when I see friends planning weekends away or just even a night out with the girls. I could go out, but it's the financial aspect that stops me too, I have to have my 'mummy' head on as mortgage/bills/ food/kids clothes/shoes trump a night out with the girls. I also miss having my own income, but I still wouldn't change it for the world.

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