herald

Wednesday 19 December 2018

Secret diary of Enda Kenny

Drat, that's all I need for tomorrow night. The camera adds 10 pounds as it is. I want to add weight to the proceedings -- not in the literal sense, though.

Ring Catherine Yore for advice. She says that a few simple stomach crunches a day keeps the pre-election spread at bay.

And it sure beats having Leo Varadkar lecturing me over the difference between a glass for white wine and a glass for red. It tastes all the bloody same to me -- I don't care which glass they use.

Or this is how it would be if we were Enda Kenny . . .

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