A philosopher walks into a bar in Old Trafford and says ...
The word philosophy comes from an Ancient Greek word that means "love of wisdom."
Greek philosopher Socrates walks into a bar. The barman asks: "Why did the chicken cross the road?" Socrates replies: "I will think about it."
Louis Van Gaal has a much vaunted philosophy of football. "My philosophy is a long story," he said. "The most important thing is we are a total human being. I consider my players as not only a player who kicks the ball from A to B," he says.
"But also his environment and him as a human being… I divide attack into four phases and also defence into four phases.
"The players know everything about the philosophy … It is a task of every human being that you transfer what you have learned about life and about football." That's what they call "mind games".