Friday 28 October 2016

Anton Savage: The Banking Inquiry's entered into its 'nexus phase' - that's posh for 'boring'

Anton Savage
Anton Savage

The banking inquiry has entered its 'Nexus Phase'. This proves that we are finally learning to copy the American tendency to brand things that don't need branding.

The Yanks love to slap a funky title on stuff: Operation Enduring Freedom (otherwise known as an invasion) or Decision 2012 (otherwise known as an election.)

For years this has been a differentiator between us and the Americans - it even applied to things as mundane as cars. We like cars called things like 'Mazda MX5' or 'Ferrari GTO' whereas the Americans were always partial to funky brand names like 'Mazda Miata' or 'Ford Mustang'.

Giving things a creative name can cover a multitude of flaws (the Mustang has become a legend despite being essentially a wagon powered by a truck engine).

This lesson has clearly been learned by the banking inquiry; it continues to ask an unending succession of people questions to which we all know the answer.

Which might seem pointless and boring. But now that they've branded it the 'Nexus Phase' we are suddenly excited. It's as if something is happening, when nothing really is.

They could all it the Explosive Climax Phase and it wouldn't change the reality, which is to date, not one single worthwhile piece of data has emerged (although David McWilliams was nearly entertaining enough to make the whole thing worthwhile).

We'll have to keep our fingers crossed that the arrival of the various bankers increases the level of insight (although the prospects aren't that promising). If they do have anything interesting to say, we can call it the 'Thanks Be To God, We Were Bored Out Of Our Minds Phase'.

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