As with life, some things are beautiful, and others just pig ugly. In this day and age, if last month’s Paris Motor Show is anything to go by, cars are getting even uglier.

The Nissan Pivo 2 is already being dubbed the Piggo 2, and it’d give the Fiat Multipla or the Citroen Berlingo a run for their money.

And there are even more where these beauties came from…

1. Skoda Roomster: The famous advertising campaign where the idiot is driving a car and can’t quite believe it’s a Skoda because he thinks its so good.

Well, after spending years rebuilding the brand that was up there with Lada, Skoda decided to ruin it all by bringing out the Roomster. It was a car so awful that I actually turned down the test drive, out of sheer embarrassment, and I don’t embarrass easily.

2. Citroen Berlingo: The ultimate car for idiots - Pope Mobile meets bowl of porridge.

To be honest this whole article could have featured Citreons only, such is the reputation for ugly cars in the French fleet.

It’s so disgusting it makes the Multipla look like an Aston Martin.

3. Fiat Multipla : Italian style . . . erm, okay. This hideous mess has one advantage over its rivals. It will never be stolen. The Multipla wasn’t even afforded the good grace of a decent name to make up for its ugliness. For the Multipla alone the Italian people should be thoroughly ashamed.

4. Nissan Note : A Real bum note from Nissan in the style stakes. The stress of my first Nissan Note experience will live long in the memory banks.

The Japanese mini-SUV was a great drive, a practical family car, a top performer, but a real ugly bugger.Nissan designers, take Note.

5. Renault Megane: The greatest thing from Renault’s point of view that they have decided to rehash the Megane is that they can confine this pig to the vaults. Possessing more ugly lumps than Mary Harney’s backside, the Megane hatchback is a sort of motoring Klingon.

It looks like Renault have learned though, and the latest generation is a million times better now that they’ve swapped points for curves.

6. Datsun Cherry : Way back when cars really were ugly, the 1970s I think they call it, along came the Datsun Cherry.

The Datsun Vomit would have been more apt for this stomach churning oriental number that still makes me nauseous. It was first released in 1970, but the 1980 version really took the biscuit.

7. VW Golf Plus: The utterly pointless Golf Plus was made for VW fans with big heads. Straight from the ‘How To Ruin a Good Design’ school, the GP sold about two models in Ireland when it was released a couple of years back.

Kind of hard to believe this is a close relative of the magnificent GTI.

For Golf Plus, see Golf Minus.

8. Limousines: Take 16 bingo-winged fat chicks dressed up like dogs dinners and wearing cowboy hats, a cartoon-like car stretched beyond recognition, and a pissed off looking driver who knows it’s only a matter of time before someone pukes all over the tacky interior.

You cannot beat the hideous Limousine for pure and utter tack.

9. Mercedes ML: (Mk1)

A scene in the very first series of the Sopranos show a Manhattan family being held at gunpoint and robbed of their ML. As the mobsters drive away towards Jersey in their beloved wagon the father is livid, and the kids in tears.

Why? They should be thrilled to have been stripped of one of the biggest disappointments in the luxury car sector, which came out around the same time as the disastrous disappointment that was the A Class.

The latest ML is a peach, but this hog-faced forefather remains a dark and shameful part of the past, that Mercedes care not to revisit.

10. Daihatsu Charade: A charade of a car, indeed.

Take a roller skate, and a big pile of dog poo, and you get the picture. Daihatsu, who also brought us the Terios, know how to do cheap very well . . . just don’t expect anything cheerful.

- Ian Mallon