I'm all about the waist. No matter what weight or shape you are, I'm of the firm belief that you can keep it somewhat in check by nipping it in the middle. A neat waist balances out ample hips, hides tummies and emphasises boobage.

In short, it creates a more feminine physique, which is why when weight creeps on, I reach straight for a cincher belt. The alternative to the optical illusion approach is to actually work at it, and Pilates teacher, Eva Berg, has just the routine. The woman's physique (you'd be forgiven for thinking she's wearing a corset underneath that tracksuit) is testament to the power of this workout.

Alongside teaching Reformer (a machine/ medieval torture device which defines the central muscle groups) and mat exercise classes, she has pioneered the Wicked Waist Workout, 15 minutes of exercises which target the deepest abdominal muscles and chip into the waist.

Berg employs a spine corrector for stretches and a Pilates chair to target the lower abdomen. The apparatus isolates the muscles, allowing you to work deeper into them.

It's excruciating to begin with but, like yoga, I begin to work into the stretches and crunches and eventually it becomes somewhat -- and I use the word loosely -- relaxing. Better still, there's none of the breathlessness or sweating you'd associate with a stint at the gym.

Berg is one of the most schooled and dedicated Pilates teachers in Ireland, and it shows. She is incredibly careful about protecting the neck and back and militant about maintaining the correct postural alignment throughout.

For instance, she makes sure that any sit-up movements target the abdominals without putting strain on the neck. Any post-class soreness is solely in the areas she works on.

After just one class, my waist felt tighter and I somehow felt taller, too. And in the interest of full disclosure, I've been back since.

Who's it for? Those who want a feminine, curvaceous physique, in particular women slimming into an event dress or preparing for a beach holiday.

Celebrity fans: Berg remains tight-lipped on the celebrities she trains but, according to rumours, she's responsible for most of Ireland's A-list bodies. Celebrities using Pilates include Megan Fox and Elle Macpherson.

Pros: Her largely female classes are ideal for women who prefer ladies-only exercising.

Cons: While the hard bodies at her classes are a glowing advertisement of Berg's body of work, newcomers can feel a little bit less toned in comparison.

Eva Berg, The Secret Pilates Studio, Rathmichael. Prices start at €215 for a 13-week course. The Wicked Waist Workout is incorporated into her 50-minute classes or can be booked as a one-on-one session. www.the-secret.biz

Power Plate

Power Plate has been hailed as the miracle exercise programme since it was launched a few years ago. It's the fitness machine du jour in France, footballers have incorporated it into their training regimes and Madonna is even said to take her phone calls while on hers (although, that says more about the maniacal diva than it does the versatility of the machine).

While it has plenty of merits, the ultimate selling point is the lack of time you have to spend on it. Its makers promise that you can be a hardbody in just three 15-minute sessions a week, making it, essentially, a workout for lazy bastards -- where do I sign up?

Which isn't to say that it's a fad or a gimmick -- on the contrary: it has solid medical cred, too. The machine was developed by Russian scientist, Vladimir Nazarov, whose vibration training was used to prevent astronauts' muscles and bones wasting when they were in space.

It was later discovered that vibration training methods increase muscle strength by 20 to 30% more than ordinary weightlifting, and in 85% less time.

The vibrations transmit waves of energy throughout the body, activating muscle contractions multiple times per second. On the flip-side, the vibrations also make you look like a twitching, teeth-chattering simpleton.

Each exercise is performed for repetitions of 30 seconds to one minute and 30 seconds at a time. Squats and lunges are challenging, sit-ups are hellish and the press-ups had me quietly cursing the instructor before collapsing into a heap.

For the warm down, there's a series of stretches which, thanks to the vibrating base, feel more like a massage, another reason why the machine is favoured by achy golfers and those with neck and back injuries.

After one session, I woke up the next morning feeling suitably sore, but my sister is a regular user and her bottom defies gravity.

Who's it for? Time-poor-types, gym- dissenters and athletes (looking to incorporate it into, rather than make it, their routine.)

Celebrity Fans: Madonna, Claudia Schiffer, Natalie Imbruglia.

Pros: Any fitness session which takes just 15 minutes has to be saluted.

Cons: It doesn't provide cardiovascular exercise, which keeps the heart and blood circulation system healthy.

Power Plate, The Sun Hut, 205 Le Fanu Road, Dublin 10. Tel: 01 623 9283. The Sun Hut is currently offering a free first-time trial. Otherwise, blocks of sessions cost €85 for ten, with three free sessions during the month of October.

Pole Dancing

Pole dancing with polestar It's 1.30 on a Friday afternoon and I'm gyrating my hips along to Kelis' Milkshake with a woman I've just met. It would be heaven on earth for a red-blooded male, given that the teacher, Sorcha, is wearing skimpy hot pants and six-inch heels, but for a prudish young woman like myself, it's the depths of hell.

The pole-dancing fitness craze has been raging for many years now, ever since it was championed by the likes of Kate Hudson and Angelina Jolie.

Its creators are loathe to associate it with the more sleazy aspects of pole dancing, even though participants are advised to wear heels and shorts to allow for easier gripping with the pole. Thank God it's a woman-only class ...

We kick off proceedings with a light warm-up before we start the first exercise. It's the hardest of all of them in that it requires a sexy circumnavigation of the pole. I'm told to arch my back, stick my breasts and bum out and march around the pole, kicking my legs up.

Sorcha performs this showpiece so seductively that I have to stop myself from sticking a fiver down her shorts. Next, she shows me how to get up on the pole. She makes it look easy and secretly I'm thinking that I'm about to wow her, given my erstwhile climbing career. I don't. In fact, I slide down as soon as I get up.

But Sorcha has faith and we're soon working on swinging around the pole, which, after a number of attempts, I eventually master.

My arms were sore for three days afterwards and my inner thighs were shaking for the rest of the afternoon. It's a challenging but ultimately rewarding workout.

Who's it for? Those looking for a fun and challenging workout; hen parties; sex addicts.

Celebrity Fans: Paris Hilton, Jessica Alba and Jennifer Aniston.

Pros: Have you seen Jennifer Aniston's arms? Enough said.

Cons: Leave your dignity at the door.

www.polestars.ie; classes nationwide. Pole-dancing fitness courses are six weeks long with a two-hour pole dancing lesson each week. €180.

Pilates Plus

Pilates plus Anyone walking through Dun Laoghaire would have no idea of the torture that is going on behind closed doors on Cumberland Street. OK, that's a touch dramatic, but my God, does Pilates Plus hurt.

The fitness class has taken the lengthening fundamentals of Pilates and coupled it with strength and weight training. The workout is designed around a piece of equipment called a Proformer. The machine works, and is adaptable to, all fitness levels thanks to springs at the machine's base. Other apparatus include free weights, arm and leg straps and magic rings.

It's a 55-minute routine, much of which you'll spend watching the clock and stealing cursory glances at the teacher to see if you can take a sneaky break, so intense is each sequence.

Thankfully, each exercise is only performed for one minute, followed by a short break. The full-body workout incorporates traditional exercises such as lunges, squats and press-ups and specially designed exercise such as 'Catfish' and 'Teaser'.

The worst, however, is 'Scrambled Eggs', an intense thigh workout that could have elicited a primal scream from me had I not point blank refused to continue mid-way through.

So, does it work? This is a workout for people of the no-pain-no-gain philosophy and -- save for the occasional self-imposed bootcamp -- I'm not one of them. In fact, I spent much of the lesson dreaming up clever excuses that would allow me to leave 10 minutes early. In retrospect, "I think I'm going to die" would have done it.

Who's it for? Those looking for an alternative to the gym; those seeking a quick fix; masochists.

Celebrity followers: Jennifer Aniston, Courtney Cox, Nicole Kidman and Liz Hurley.

Pros: The efficient online booking system guarantees a place at the class and provides updates on the timetable.

Cons: Pilates was originally developed for healing and to improve postural alignment. This is a pumped-up version, so should be eschewed by those seeking a more restorative workout.

Pilates Plus, 8 Cumberland Street, Dun Laoghaire. €15 for first-time students and €30 per class thereafter. €252 for 10 sessions.

www.pilatesplusdublin.com HQ

- Katie Byrne