herald

Wednesday 20 September 2017

Please give us more of silent Oliver

In an interview yesterday, Ireland's unfunniest man -- Oliver Callan -- admitted that he was a very quiet child.

"I just didn't talk in school," he admitted. "Teachers would ask 'why is he staring off into the distance?'"

Bearing in mind that Callan (below) can't open his mouth these days without saying something that insults your intelligence, this early vow of silence should leave us with nothing but regret.

Oliver's school- days may not have been the best days of his own life, but they must surely have been for all his classmates.

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