herald

Wednesday 20 September 2017

Oh no, here comes Mushy Peas Geldof

PEACHES Geldof is the image of her mother at times, square footage of tattoo ink notwithstanding.

The late Paula Yates (below) was something of a wild child in her time, posing naked for Penthouse magazine and bagging herself a permanent place in the spotlight with her on-the-bed interviews for a TV show. Peaches has similarly flirted outrageously with fame.

A divorcee by the time she was 21, topless pictures of her had already cost her a lucrative modelling job.

Unlike her mum though, who died from an accidental heroin overdose, Peaches has always insisted that she doesn't do drugs.

Now as Peaches announces she's expecting a baby, the question we hardly dared ask was: what on earth will she call the poor thing when it's born?

Having been named herself for a tin of fruit and with sisters Fifi Trixibelle and Pixie lumbered with the monikers of a couple of handbag Chihuahuas, one can only wince at what might be in store.

Perhaps Peaches will stick with the theme of canned goods and call her child Sardines or Mushy Peas.

Tomatoes Geldof has a ring to it, but it's not as catchy as Mackerel Fillet. In a few years time, roll call at the Geldofs could sound like a shopping list.

Might we respectfully suggest that she do as her mother likely did and just call her children whatever pops into her head when the time comes, like Curly Wurly, Jet Ski or Bum Muffin.

We jest of course and look forward as much as anyone to the healthy arrival of little Purple Raspberry Bitsy Cutiebogey Geldof.

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